Feeling overwhelmed after an identity theft? Here’s where to start

Discovering you’ve been targeted by identity crime can be disorienting. Panic, uncertainty, and even embarrassment will often set in before you know what to do next. As Eva Velasquez, CEO of the Identity Theft Resource Center (ITRC), explained in episode 15.6 of our Random but Memorable podcast:

“We tend to think of victims as this homogenous group, and they're not. They're people coming into this life event with all kinds of history and different life experiences. But in most cases there is a sense of confusion and overwhelm.”

Whether you’re experiencing that fallout yourself or supporting someone else, the question is the same: what comes next? Eva shared a series of steps on the show that can help you move from feeling overwhelmed to taking control. We break them down below in three phases: Recognition, Response, and Recovery.

Phase 1: Recognition

It sounds simple, but the hardest part of an identity crime is often accepting that you’ve been targeted. As Eva puts it, “You can't start recovering until there's an acknowledgement that this has happened.”

Step 1. Acknowledge the problem 

Many victims struggle to believe what’s happening, especially when things turn personal. “When you're dealing with things like relationship or romance scams, understanding that you're a victim of a scam in the first place is a big, big hurdle,” Eva says. 

Victims often blame themselves, but scammers are extremely sophisticated. “This isn't about being gullible,” Eva says. “Please don't beat yourself up. Just say, ‘okay, I need to get this handled.’”

Step 2. Try to understand the scope of the problem

Identity theft isn’t always obvious. Sometimes it’s a single fraudulent credit card charge; other times, it’s new loans – or even losing control of your accounts.

As Eva explains: “We tend to use the term identity theft as this all-encompassing term, but really that's just the stealing of identity credentials, the stealing of data… Identity misuse or identity fraud is the misuse of that information.”

💡 Did you know?

Identity crimes start with stolen data – often through a data breach or scam. From there, misuse often falls into three main buckets:

• Account takeover: An existing bank, email, or social media account is hijacked.
• New account fraud: A thief opens new credit cards, loans, or bank accounts in your name.
• Government benefits fraud: Your identity is used to claim unemployment, SNAP, or tax refunds.

Having this distinction in mind may help you deal with banks, agencies, or online platforms. And knowing whether you’re facing an account takeover, a new account in your name, or a scam gone wrong will shape your next steps. 

Phase 2: Response

The biggest hurdle to recovery is often knowing where to start. The most common response Eva sees is a sense of being completely overwhelmed: “It’s a feeling like, ‘okay, there are 20 things that I have to do and I don't know how I'm going to get through them all.’ And so there's this inertia of not knowing where to start.”

The key is to break recovery into manageable steps.

Step 3. Get your documents in order

Start collecting evidence. This will make every future conversation with banks, agencies, or the police easier. “Get your documentation together before you take the next step because you're going to need it,” Eva says. “If it's a scam, get the documentation of the conversations, whether that's screenshots of text messages or an email trail, writing down the URLs.”

Step 4. Report what’s happened

Filing a police report is usually a required step to help you dispute fraudulent accounts and trigger consumer protection laws. At the very least, it creates an official record of what’s happened.

However, Eva cautions that a police report doesn’t always have the results you might hope for. “I think it’s really important to manage people's expectations. Often you don't know who it is and don't have enough information for them to even begin to conduct an investigation.”

In other words, the police report is less about “catching the criminal” and more about protecting you – establishing that you are not responsible for debts or actions taken in your name in this instance.

Step 5. Don’t pay ransoms and avoid unnecessary risks

Scammers sometimes demand payment to “return” stolen accounts or data. Don’t comply.

“It's very likely that even if you were to pay the ransom or meet the demands, whatever they are, you're not getting control of that account back,” Eva says. “There's no honor among thieves.”

She also urges victims to resist the temptation to confront the scammer. “We've seen some instances of that when people have somehow gotten an alert, for example, that the thief is at this bank right now. I understand the desire to go confront that person for violating you and using your identity, but I would strongly advise against that.”

The safest path is to document, report, and let the process play out, knowing the report is a vital piece of your recovery plan, even if it doesn’t deliver immediate justice.

Phase 3: Recovery

Once the immediate steps are taken, recovery involves finding the right support and staying the course until the issue is resolved.

Step 6. Lean on support

You don’t have to do this alone. If you’re stuck or confused, reach out to the Identity Theft Resource Center. They provide free case managers who can walk you through the process, even if you’ve hit a roadblock with your bank.

“If you don't even know where to start… call us and tell us what happened,” Eva says. “Even if you do know – let's say you called that credit card issuer and they told you to pound sand, which does happen. Call us and we'll help point you in the right direction of getting the right supporting documentation so that you can go back to them and say, ‘no, that wasn't me. Here's my proof.’”

Step 7. Understand that recovery looks different every time

The path back from identity theft isn’t one-size-fits-all. Some cases can be wrapped up quickly. “If it's a less complex case, like erroneous charges on an existing account, that's usually handled and it's relatively seamless,” Eva says.

Other situations, such as when someone uses your identity in government systems or even in connection with a crime, can take much longer to untangle.

“When you start getting into more esoteric and complex case types… you could potentially have a criminal record floating around out there that you don't know about. And… that can take years.”

The important thing to remember is that slower recovery doesn’t mean no recovery. Progress may take time, but there are resources and processes in place to help you through it.

Where to turn next

The ITRC offers free, unlimited support for victims. Whether you need a quick gut check or long-term guidance, real case managers will help you make a recovery plan. Visit idtheftcenter.org or call 888-400-5530.

And for a deeper dive into scams, recovery, and identity hygiene tips (like freezing your credit and using passkeys), listen to episode 15.6 ofRandom but Memorable.

In the U.S, You can also go to the Federal Trade Commission and get that FTC identity theft affidavit from IDtheft.gov.